Nothing thrills me more than to receive a phone call from a mom who just needs to chat, ask a few questions and have someone listen. Also, to offer encouragement after a discouraging doctors appointment. Near term expectant moms have those darn hormones that often try to weigh on their minds and can potentially alter their upcoming birth stories. I encourage labor coaches, medical providers and other support people to understand, "There IS a difference between simply supporting a mom and actually Encouraging her!" This super mom, Ashley says to me out of frustration, "Maybe, I will just get an epidural?" I replied, "No you will not, you will let your husband coach you, have your cry and then get your head back on straight." She didn't really want or need an epidural, but when we have unexpected obstacles to overcome, labor comes on quickly, we get disturbed or our relaxation is challenged, etc. that is how our near term / laboring mind works. I am happy to say her husband, Derek, helped her avoid epidural and together they gave birth naturally to their third baby! This is one of the greatest compliments and testaments to the valuable work we as childbirth educators and doulas offer. 🙌 Even though today is Halloween, I just light up like a Christmas tree when a previous birth family client text me photos of their new baby and share they successfully met their laboring goals together. (And, extra special when this mom refused to allow her husband to even help with the first two 😆) Turns out Dad was a way better coach than she ever imagined! ❤️ Ashley is exceptionally grateful to her husband for helping her push through late labor / transition drug-free. His decision to help her push through naturally also paid off big in the end since their baby experienced difficulties at birth and entered the world with an Apgar score of 1 out of 10. Special thanks to the amazing staff of Atrium Health Pineville, their midwife Lori Williamson, CNM, their labor and delivery nurses and NICU support team for all the TLC shown to the Bulmer Family! Your Birth Helper salutes you all for taking such good care of them through this scary situation. An October, near Halloween baby scare its parents?.... no that would never happen! Something tells me this feisty baby boy will make scaring his parents, each year during the month of October, a new family tradition.

Couple trains 12 weeks with Your Birth Helper to prepare her body to give birth epidural free in Northside Gwinnett Medical Center.

Together, Mom & Dad execute a beautiful drug free natural birth! Think it can’t be done... better think again! With training, you can too!

Their Birth- Their Way, even during Covid restrictions, with Virtual Doula Assistance! With TRAINING - You CAN TOO!

The Tolbert Family invites you to share their journey~ written by second time Mom, Amanda. Photo's by Your Birth Helper Doula's, Pamela Sauls & Nancy Cook. Wow – three weeks has already passed since Boone Samson made his way into the world. The world that turned a bit upside down these days with COVID-19 reminding folks that we are a part of a community and challenging folks to go the extra mile to keep their neighbors safe. I am devastated by the increased death toll, not just in the United States, but all around the world. And as we try and combat this deadly virus; we are pushing ourselves into what could be a recession. Definitely a difficult time in our history. But as my family and I “social distance” or more preferred, as we “physically distance” ourselves, I’m taking the time to reflect on many things, one of which was Boone’s birth. With both of our boys, we chose the Bradley Method of childbirth. First, I do want to say it’s easier to commit to the twelve-week training with the first, because let’s face it, juggling schedules of a parent in school, working parent, and a toddler – 2 hours of night class a week for 12 weeks is tricky. We were well educated by our Bradley instructor, Carole, prior to the birth of our first son, Barrett Mason. Before Boone’s birth, we recommitted to Bradley, read through our workbook, stayed close to the eating and exercise regimen to remain low risk, and practiced relaxation. We also freshened up with our doula Dream Team – Pam and Nancy with Your Birth Helper, through a labor workshop and preparation phone calls (which included the direction to eat dates to prepare the uterus for labor – honestly, not my favorite, like at all 😊, drink labor prep tea, and you know however else you soften the cervix *wink* 😉). So, how did we end up knowing about or choosing to educate ourselves with Bradley and hiring Your Birth Helper? Well, it was a journey. In 2017, when we found out we were pregnant, we had no idea what to expect. We went to doctor’s appointments, as directed, and figured that our doctors would tell us what to do. Then due to some experiences that were stuck in my head, I started to ask questions. I started asking my OB about the effects of an epidural and what about having a baby without one. Um… she laughed. Literally laughed in my face and said she had no clue why anyone would want to have a baby without an epidural. I gave her a blank stare. She came back around and said, you can’t just walk into a hospital and have a natural, drug-free birth without training like you are going to run a marathon. She said, don’t get me wrong, I love drug-free births, because the doulas have the rooms calm, quiet, and smelling good. Well… naturally, my next question – what the heck was a doula? Sounded a bit too crunchy for me. She emailed me some recommended doulas. And that list was on my desk for weeks before I decided to call and see what this was all about. So, after going down the list, I finally got to Pam Sauls, Your Birth Helper. She answers and I said um… I’m calling because I’d like to know what a doula is. Pam went to talking for an hour and not necessarily just about a doula, but about what I wanted from my birth experience. Basically, I had nothing. I had no answers and no clue. I initially thought that the OB would tell me what to do, but over the past few weeks/months, I realized that we had choices. I had no idea what those choices were or how to decide. Later that week, Pam came to consult with us. We decided that we wanted to train via the Bradley Method and prepare for a drug-free birth. However, at that time, we didn’t decide that drug-free is what we wanted (I didn’t know if I could handle it). But we wanted to train to be able to, in the event that it was too late for an epidural, or I wasn’t a candidate for an epidural – whatever the case could be, we wanted to be prepared for that marathon of no drugs to make sure I could get through it. As we went further along into the pregnancy, through our Bradley training, we learned the benefits of drug-free childbirth for the baby and the complications that epidurals and interventions could cause to the labor process, mom, and baby. We then decided that we wanted to pursue a natural, drug-free birth. Well after 30 weeks into my pregnancy, we decided to switch healthcare providers at the recommendation of Pam and Nancy. We finished out our pregnancy exams and birth of our son with Piedmont OBGYN. This practice and their partner hospital supported natural childbirth and had almost as many midwives as OBs. Overall, we have been very satisfied with Piedmont and would recommend then to friends and family. Midwife Sage Caught Barrett Now, childbirth is not one size fits all, contrary to what some of your loved ones may think. Your moms labor and birth may be like yours, maybe not. Your own pregnancies and births may be similar to each other, but likely, not. Doctors and midwives have a tough job. The good ones balance the science and their experiences with the needs and desires of the soon to be mamas - the art. At times its not easy. It requires trust. Lots of trust! Thankfully, I had some amazing and trusting midwives and nurses to help me bring my boys into this world. With Barrett, I had been in second stage labor (pushing) for several hours. If you run out of energy to push, well… you may not be able to have the birth experience you had planned. My midwife, Sage, started to let us know that she was concerned about how long I could push, how long I would have the endurance. So was I! I told her I didn’t know, but I was going to push with all I had. After a few more push-with-everything-I-had pushes, she leaned over and told my husband that I have what it takes, and we are going to keep going. Leading into hour 4 of second stage labor, Barrett was born. Boone was getting close to 42 weeks and by reports from the latest ultrasound and OB, the potential to be quite a large baby. The last few weeks, these little's just pack on weight, so the longer they are on the inside, the bigger they will be. And for some reason, my babies like to stay on the inside well over 40 weeks. Tammy, my midwife, asked me during my final appointment how I felt about the estimation of his weight. Anyone that knows me knows how I get about the weight of my babies in the womb. I worry about it constantly and I don’t like for anyone to mention that they think I’ll have a big baby, because Aaron is big – or whatever crap, I’ve heard it all. So, needless to say, I am very sensitive about it. Pam and Nancy, from Your Birth Helper, were supportive in building me up and not letting me focus on that. Some people have big babies, some don’t. It’s not necessarily the size of the spouse. Factors like what you eat during pregnancy and how long the babies stays in the womb, can help determine the size of your baby – even more so than the size of your partner. Both my boys would likely have been 7-8 pounds if they would have been born at 40 weeks. Tammy went on to tell me that a mother knows. She said a mother’s guess of her baby’s weight is far more accurate than ultrasounds and even their estimates. And that I shouldn’t fear the estimates (which were as high as 11 pounds), but trust in myself. Now, Boone was a big baby at birth, just 2 oz. shy of 10 pounds. But that conversation, that day, meant so much to me. It meant that trust existed, and she let me know that I am the mom and that this isn’t all science. It was so encouraging. Two days later, she along with Pam and Aaron by my side, helped me birth Boone. So, back to before when I was acquiring about what a doula was. Well, here is the answer. If you have Your Birth Helper, a doula is the most amazing person you and your partner can have during this marathon and life changing event. A doula is your friend. A doula is an extension of your family.  A doula is one of the best decisions we have ever made. Following our birth plan and having a natural, drug-free birth was of the utmost importance to us. I am not sure that we would have been able to achieve our goals and follow our plan as close as we could (birth is unpredictable, sometimes you must pivot) without Pam and Nancy by our side. Pam was with us through the labor and birth of both boys. She, along with my husband, helped me maintain my composure (best I could), help me focus on breathing… but more than that – helped me to move the boys down and out. It is definitely called labor for a reason and your body is so capable of doing it. However, there are 2 ways to labor, you can cause your body to take longer or you can help the process (as painful and uncomfortable as it may be). For me, that is where I found enormous value in having her there. She made me do things that were uncomfortable, kept me moving, and kept me doing things that helped my boys get into the right position and ultimately, come out. I’m pretty sure I told her no 500 times during labor, but was compliant every time. Why – because of trust. I trusted Pam to do her job. I trusted her experience and our partnership. She’s the best. She’s not afraid to get dirty and stand up for you. She is there for you, but not blindly. She has a lot of experience and helps direct you when things are going your way, but even more importantly when they are not. She makes sure you understand that decisions lead to other decisions and potentially interventions. She also makes sure you are educated. That you go into your birth prepared for what’s to come and prepared for things you didn’t plan for. She will be your biggest cheerleader, but doesn’t just sugar coat things. And, she believes in the power of your partner and yall’s bond. She is not and will never call herself a labor coach. To her, that job is already taken by your partner. Now back to Boone’s birth…. Even before getting to the hospital, Pam and Nancy were there for me. After I rounded out the 40th week, we started talking about induction. The flu had come through our house and hit my husband and toddler. I really think my body didn’t allow labor to start with the sickness in our home. I think prayers were answered that Boone stay safe. After the flu came around, then I got sick with a virus causing an extremely wet cough. I coughed so much for so long that I was certain I had broken ribs. Every cough came with extreme anxiety. So, my body took some time to heal.  Another week came and went with no sign of labor – just a nasty cough that kept me in pain and up all night. My next appointment, we had to talk about an induction. I was getting close to 42 weeks and although the non-stress test and ultrasound showed a healthy baby, lots of amniotic fluid, and a healthy placenta, they were worried about his size. Boone wasn’t large for being the gestational age of 42 weeks, but the longer they are inside, it’s inevitable that they will grow larger. The head is built to morph in the birth canal, but oddly enough what they worry about are the shoulders. I figured shoulders were more mallable than a head, but I guess not. I was strongly opposed to an induction and held off the discussions as long as I could. Reason being is that I wanted labor to be as natural as possible and induction (though sometimes necessary) starts the process off unnaturally – which itself isn’t bad, but what other things could happen and where could those decisions lead you. Those were my fears. Pam was there for me. She worked and worked to help get me into labor from Thursday afternoon to Saturday morning. We walked miles and miles up hills together. She took me all over town to eat food that I normally wouldn’t eat to get my stomach rumbling. She helped me relax and take contractions in ways that would help the baby get into the right positions. She helped me stay calm and out of my own head. She says sometimes her biggest challenge is people in the mother’s life. She helps get things moving and get girls into labor, despite sometimes well meaning unsolicited comments, some even from complete strangers, the things people say and well, labor stops again. Stress releases adrenaline and adrenaline stops or slows labor. Labor is a big deal for your body and your emotions can impact it – adrenaline can slow labor and being sad or mad can have an effect. Pam says you are to be elevator music – don’t get too high or too low, be consistent. Saturday morning, Pam, Aaron, and I went into the hospital together for my scheduled induction. Yes, everything we did to get into labor, got me some early labor contractions, but unfortunately, I wasn’t in an active labor pattern by Saturday morning. My induction wasn’t what I pictured and what I had been afraid of. The plan was to have my water broken by my midwife. Initially, that scared me. Because in my head, I wondered well what’s next if that didn’t get things going. But with Pam, I walked into the hospital Saturday morning having contractions. My fear was gone, because I felt that if I had progressed this much naturally (with the help of Pam), that the breaking of my waters would just be the push that my body needed to get into active labor. My water was broke at 9AM and by 10AM, I was in active labor. Pam and my husband were right there by my side as I endured some pretty strong contractions. Pam made sure that I was sinking into them, giving into them and not doing things counterproductive to moving the baby down. Aaron held me up – physically and emotionally. With each contraction, I sank into him, giving him my full body weight and also, sank into his words to breathe and constantly reminding me how strong I was and how proud of me he was. We walked the halls of the maternity ward, stopping what seemed like every couple of steps. Up next was the tub, but labor had progressed so quickly that we were close to second stage labor, so we had to forgo the tub. The tub was my bargaining chip with Pam. She wanted me to walk the halls, but I was having strong contractions and told her no. Not because I was afraid to walk, but because I was worried about not being in complete control with a contraction came… not being able to relax. That’s what scared me while I was in labor the most, that my body was doing something that I needed to participate in, but had no control over. It was important that I relax and sink down into contractions, but what if I was in the middle of changing positions, how do I quickly get in a comfortable, relaxing position. Anyway, after some negotiating, I agreed to walk the halls if the next stop was the tub, so I could really relax. At about 11:30AM, I had to start laboring down. Which for me has been one of the toughest parts of labor. I felt the extreme urge to push, however my cervix was only dilated to 8 cm. This is when it got a little crazy and both Pam and Tammy came to my rescue. I will be honest; laboring down is not easy. Everything you have in your entire body wants you to push with everything you have, but you can’t. You must wait. Pushing too early can cause swelling of the cervix, which does absolutely the opposite of what you want. You want a larger opening, not smaller. Tammy kept calm and kept telling me how strong I was and how soon we would be able to meet my little boy. Pam kept me to keep moving, changing positions every 30 minutes or so. At 12:30 p.m., finally, I was told that I could give in to the urge to push and I did. Thirty minutes later, Boone shot out like a rocket. Or so we said, until we realized he was almost 10 pounds. Then we changed our tune to shot out like a cannonball – felt more appropriate. They were prepared for his shoulders to be tight, but Tammy was able to help him out with no problem and very quickly. And, Nancy arrived just in time to capture some fabulous birth photos. As soon as he was born, we were skin to skin and nothing else mattered. As I laid with my new baby on my chest and my body feeling lifeless, I clung to Aaron. I clung to him, because he is my person. I love him and am so thankful that he has been by my side while I bring our boys into the world, and every step of the way afterward. Looking back, I count our blessings every day. Boone was healthy. I was healthy. Thankfully! Childbirth is unpredictable. I believe keeping it simple and natural, and having Pam, Aaron, and Tammy by my side were the real reasons I could have a natural birth and a healthy boy. Boone came out with his cord wrapped around his neck and his heart rate would drop during a contraction. But thankfully come back up. Pam made sure I kept moving into positions that were more favorable to get him out quicker and keep some of the pressure off him. There were clearly positions he could tolerate better than others. I am thankful for Tammy’s patience and calm demeanor. She was smart about our safety, but stayed calm and encouraging. I could not even tell from her face that anything was going on until Aaron told me about the cord and his heart rate roller coaster after he was born. Enjoy this final short slideshow... Thanks Pam, Nancy and Your Birth Helper Teams for all that you do! Much love, Tolbert Family – party of 4 😊

What can I say about these two? If you have the pleasure of knowing Jon and Marissa Spangler, you are well entertained and blessed. These two exude love for one another and for their Savior Jesus Christ. Whether you are a person of faith or not, these two could win you over and within minutes you would feel as if you had known them forever. I was privileged to have them in my childbirth class. Marissa was like a lot of women. Her mindset was, I'm not sure if he will come to class or not. Therefore, if I get him here, it needs to be a good class." I just laughed quietly and thought to myself, I think they are ALL good and important. More specifically, what she was referring to was, the logistics and time it would take from their busy schedules to train with me on the farm. My barn house classroom, where I teach expectant couples is located northeast of Athens, Ga. Marissa knew it would be challenging to get Jon to class, simply because, it was over an hour drive out to the country. I simply replied, "whatever you have to do just get him here. I'll do the rest." Marissa was very brave and dedicated to train in The Bradley Method® despite the long drive and arriving for her first class alone. I took her under my motherly doula wings and advised her she was having the wrong conversation with her man. I asked, "Did you get pregnant by yourself?" She replied, "No." I simply again encouraged her to trust me and get him here. I promised if she did, he would come back. I pondered, why would she give him a pass when it comes to learning how to get the baby out of her body? And, what do you know class three rolled around and the two once again became one. This time, united for a new purpose. Jon would also become educated in the natural process. Not just for Marissa's sake, but also for his. How could he possibly support her, if he had no idea what his role was in all this. Some call women lucky if their husband's attend childbirth education classes with them. A common phrase is called, "EXPECTING." I call it, "EXPECTED." It should be expected your spouse/ partner accompanies mom as she educates and trains for labor/ birth. Together, as in team. How wonderful for a woman to be able to say... my partner was there for me every step of the way and I couldn't have done this without that support! Jon was a natural himself. Shown here classmates compete against the girls. Their task was to masters the coach cards, involving stages of labor and how the coach can help during each phase. He only shrugged his shoulders a few times...lol. New mom Marissa shared: The reason I resonate with The Bradley Method ® twelve week training - I’m the type of person that will research everything I can before doing anything so I can get the best possible outcome. After looking into the Bradley Method®, I knew it was the best training to get to be best prepared for labor and delivery. I don’t want to just rely on quick fixes that mask problems, so the fact that the Bradley method took so many natural aspects into account in order to prepare my body, I knew it was the best! It is important that couples understand the how and from where babies come out and how to understand their pregnant wives. How to help her stay nutritionally sound, prepare her body physically, prepare her mind mentally and emotionally prepare for what is known as the hardest work a woman will ever do. Some women have challenges that present during pregnancy, some during labor and others during breastfeeding or postpartum. The goal would be for moms and dads to have a basic working knowledge of each and how to apply what they have learned to give them the best chances of accomplishing their individual birthing goals. Marissa and Jon shares why they decided to hire a doula to support them during their hospital birth: - Jon? jk lol well I originally wanted a doula, because I know I can be a VERY expressive person and my husband is a words of affirmation person. If I’m not doing well, he will take it personally, so I knew I needed someone else there to help guide our experience and it could be the best experience for my husband as well. I had no idea what it would be like and ended up being SO much better than I had any idea it could be! What part of your experience with Dr Pohl and hospital staff did you appreciate the most? - I love that Dr Pohl will do whatever he has to do to make sure you won’t need a cesarean, if it can be avoided. He also places high value on taking care of your body naturally without medicine when possible. Our bodies can do amazing things, and if we just provide them with the right things they need, we can avoid so many unnecessary medications and procedures. He was also right on board with that, as well as being respectful of my wishes for the labor, without being pushy If he has an opposing view. For Marissa, she was hoping to attempt a natural birth, or at least, have as few medical interventions as possible in the process. And, she definitely wanted to avoid cesarean surgery. Earlier in her pregnancy, Marissa was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. She was able to manage her sugar intake successfully avoiding insulin with nutrition and exercise. Many providers will suggest a 38 or 39 week induction for women diagnosed with gestational diabetes, depending on how mom is managing her sugar or insulin levels. Marissa shared the following personal tips: What did you guys find effective to help treat symptoms etc.? - I didn’t have many too symptoms other than tingly arms and hands and heartburn, and noticed diet played a huge role in heartburn. I also had gestational diabetes, but again was diet controlled. One thing, I definitely suggest is getting a chiropractor certified in the Webster technique. First off, she immediately took away the tingly/numb feeling in my arms and hands (which i was told by nurses that it was just carpal tunnel and there was nothing i could do about it). Any time my hips were hurting or anything, my chiropractor helped tremendously! She even adjusted me for heartburn and I noticed a massive change in that too. What were your initial thoughts regarding being overdue and suggested induction? - we actually had to get induced a week early. My hopes were that I could naturally induce myself, but with having symptoms of cholestasis starting at 38 weeks and high blood pressure, Dr Pohl suggested the risk was not worth waiting another week to get the results of my blood test to find out if I definitely had cholestasis, and suggested an induction. I was immediately so sad I couldn’t let my body do this naturally and was mainly just concerned that my body would go through even more stress than needed now not being able to labor at home anymore and just wanted to make sure the baby would be ok. How did you feel about the game plan established with me to help get you prep for labor naturally: walking hills, etc. and how did it make you feel while walking to begin to notice contractions? - I was looking forward to it but never go to. Wish we had! Jon ended up fighting a cold and Marissa, herself, hadn't been sleeping well herself. Then an unusual and quite unpleasant itching had began to appear. Due to a combination circumstances, they decision was made during her routine 39 week appointment to send her to the hospital for immediate induction. She hadn't slept, her obstetrician, Dr. Joseph Pohl, may have suspected a big baby due to gestational diabetes. There was also the concern of her liver. When her labor began to pick up in a more solid contraction pattern, Jon and Marissa were texting for Doula help to come on. The Pitocin was creating powerful contractions and fears began to creep in. Jon was by his wife's side the entire time, coaching her all the way. He assisted Marissa with ease, reaching out often during labor, as needed, with updates, questions and concerns during her induction and calling us to join them during active labor. Marissa decided the most challenging part of her labor, etc. was, - definitely the induction. For 12 hours straight, I had contractions lasting a minute long with only a minute break between each one...for 12 hours straight! There was no break. Going into this, I told myself not to stress, because I would get breaks between contractions, but the use of Cervadil to prep my cervix, definitely did not allow for that. After going 12 hours and knowing I still had to endure pitocin, and Dr. Pohl also suggested an amniotomy to progress my labor (breaking my water bag -which I agreed to try), for me, I knew at that point, I had to cave in and get the epidural in hopes to grant me some relief and not stress myself or baby throughout the remainder of my labor. My teammate, Doula Nikki Reeves, arrived first to offer support. Marissa had little sleep from her all night hospital stay, but had spent the morning and afternoon hours working hard by assuming a variety of labor positions. However, you can tell from this photo, her all time favorite was side lie with the peanut ball enjoying those warm blankets! Special thanks to the nurses for spoiling her! Now, in Marissa's defense Induction changes everything. What may have been a manageable experience with her body producing spontaneous contractions, has now been replaced with man-made "Cervadil and Pitocin Contractions." She had her work cut out for her and despite her best efforts, even with hands on assistance, she couldn't seem to get herself into a relaxed enough state for her cervix to make positive changes. They then began exploring their options. Since they formerly tried utilizing Pitocin alone, her doctor suggested trying amniotomy to progress labor, her next step would be to try an epidural and see if it could help her cervix make the needed changes to give birth vaginally. The most exciting part, Marissa recalled, ~was when I was told I must be in transition (I was starting to get cold), because then I knew our baby would be coming soon! A few hours later, it was time to push. Marissa used the classic position for push phase as Jon, Nikki and I, helped support her legs. She pushed like a Champ! Shortly thereafter, the baby began to make his decent. First time moms on average will push between 1-2 hours and sometimes depending on how dense the epidural is and often can be 3-4 hours or more. Pushing times, in general for a first baby, vary greatly, not just from woman to woman, but also unmedicated or medicated. Also, the head position, for example, posterior presentation or asynclitic head positions and difficulty with head molding also play a factor in the time it takes to give birth. With her final push, Dr. Pohl, gently helps guide the baby out. Did you know the average umbilical cord is approximately 21 inches long? It contains two arteries and one vein. It transports blood, oxygen, nutrients and waste- none of which mix. Our creator was something and judging from the size of this little fellow's cord, Marissa fed him real well in utero. Good job Mom! I do believe God and the universe in general, has a way of bringing couples together for a variety of reasons. Divine appointments as I like to call them. Jon openly declared, he is a product of the King. And, despite his former troubled life, in which he struggled with drug addiction, he had since been transformed. Marissa was also very transparent, sharing she had experienced multiple abortions in her youth. The couple desired to personally speak openly from their hearts, to readers of their birth story. Having had 3 abortions before ever turning 18, I had to kind of shut it off from my mind as my coping mechanism and pretend everything was ok for years. But, when it finally came to the time that I wanted to have children with my husband, there was this thought deep inside me that thought I didn’t deserve it. Even though I’m great with children, how could I be trusted now, if I valued life so little before. There were also the thoughts that maybe, I would be punished for my decisions and I placed it under the blanket of “reaping what I had sowed” and told myself my reproductive organs were no longer going to do what they were designed to do. Here I was finally a grown Christian, yet I had these thoughts that went against the foundation of my faith in redemption. I remember when God actually told me I was pregnant. I was worshipping to “Here Again” by Elevation Worship with the staff at my church, and one of our pastors started to encourage us to prophesy over the situations in our lives like Ezekiel prophesied over the dry bones to come to life in Ezekiel 37. The moment I heard God tell me I was pregnant with a little boy, I couldn’t help but weep. All the years of holding back the tears and belief in the possibility of having children, because of my actions in my youth, suddenly came gushing out of me. I realized it was never about me, I don’t need to go back to the beginning of where I went wrong and I didn’t need to worry about tomorrow. God was with me in the middle. And even when I may have wanted to beat myself up, because of my thoughts, God meets us no matter where we are! He’s bigger than our thoughts and our actions, and he’s willing to prove you wrong, even when your faith is lacking, just to pour his love out on you. Because, while you may think you’re not deserving, HE DOES! Marissa Spangler I asked Jon if he would be willing to speak to other expectant fathers who may have mixed emotions about becoming a father. A young man who may be struggling, considering how a baby entering the world would affect his life? Maybe, an older man who has longed to become a Father, who has a child already, but simply does't know how? A young man who maybe struggling with addiction, job loss or homelessness? Well, you guys are in good hands, Jon has some words to share with you below from his own personal trials, which led him to this day of celebrating his first born son's happy "BIRTH"day! To the fellow fathers to be: I too went thru self-questions of “Am I going to be a good father? Am I really cut out for this? I don’t want my son to go thru what I went thru, how can I prevent that? What can I do to better myself before my life changes FOREVER?” We each have days, weeks, months or (if your like me)... YEARS, of decision making we regret. But the fact of the matter is there is NO going back. All you can do is pick yourself up off the floor and start moving in the right direction. In my personal journey, I tried a lot of different routes that were presented as “the only way that works.” But what was “right” for someone else doesn’t mean it’s really right, like absolutely, DIVINELY RIGHT. Over time I began to realize that just because someone says it’s “right,” it doesn’t really mean it is. It’s simply someone’s opinion from there experience. I grew up going to church, but never felt connected. I made a lot of dumb decisions and embarrassed my family over and over again. I was hurting and I didn’t care. I wanted to make them happy but I never felt adequate. So after years and years of trying to measure up to others qualifications, not being able to do so and choosing drugs to escape the pain, depression set in at a whole new level and I contemplated suicide. My father had just died and my last words to him were of disrespect. I was stuck in jail and I had no where to go, no way of escaping the torment in my heart and my head. Drugs weren’t available and I had to face my demons or give into their luring. At that breaking point I cried out in agony for it to end. I heard a still small voice inside me say “pick up your Bible.” Begrudgingly, still very confused, I picked it up and flipped it open. It opened to Romans chapter 8. I didn’t make it past verse 1. I was stuck. God wanted me to get this. “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.” Romans 8:1 ESV In that moment, weeping on the floor, it began to sink in... The reason I was experiencing great loss and depression is because I was deciding to follow my flesh. The very next day I grabbed some Ramen noodle cups (styrofoam), ripped them up into little pieces and put them into one Ramen cup. I placed a wet piece of paper on the floor and POPPED the light switch (prisoners way of making fire for cigarettes etc), I lit the cup of styrofoam and placed a paper lunch bag over top of it. The SOOT that collected was scraped off with a rubber spoon and placed into a cup with shampoo. I now had ink! Then I grabbed a staple out of a recent letter received by my bunk mate, and sharpened it and stuck it in the end of my rubber pencil. Then I began to TATTOO “ROMANS 8:1” on my left forearm. I decided I would NEVER forget I was free as long as I walked by the Spirit. This would remind me every single day. I felt alive! I kept reading the Word and planned on putting Jeremiah 29:11 on my right forearm, but by God’s favor and grace I was released a year EARLY within 2 weeks of making that decision. All that to say this: we’re never gonna get it ALL right. We’re not designed to. But there comes a point when you know in your heart of hearts that something isn’t “right,” and we wonder if there’s really something to this Jesus thing. Well I pray my testimony encourages you to consider him again. I now am the proud father of an incredible son, the husband to a beautiful wife, the owner of a thriving construction company, a family member to a loving church and a future pastor of my very own flock. God’s made us for a purpose and a destiny. This child you’re about to conceive is a MAJOR part of it. Check out Matthew 6:33, then treasure your time with your pregnant wife, your son or daughter who’s on the way, do your part and you’ll see God move on your behalf. Whatever it is you’re going thru, He is the ONLY way, He is the ONLY truth, and the ONLY life. I’d be happy to chat, share, listen or discuss. DM Pam and she’ll have me contact you directly. Love and peace, Jon Marissa's tips for readers: I would suggest to other couples who may become overdue or are facing medical interventions/ induction, etc.... - I was not personally overdue, but if moms should be facing anything I was facing, I would say just remember you always want to put the baby’s best interest first before your convictions. Sometimes plans need to change, and if it means a healthy baby in the end, then it’s worth it. - definitely do both the Bradley Method® 12 segment course and hire a competent doula! Don't cheat yourself out of proper training. Both are so worth it and I can’t imagine having not done both of those things. Plus, I also highly recommend Dr. Pohl for anyone in the Gwinnett area and Dr. Laura Russo in Suwanee, for quality chiropractic care for anyone in that area. Why would you recommend YBH or Your Birth Helper team to assist you in labor? - I felt so much more at ease knowing how much experience Pamela has and trusted her opinion in helping with various things. My husband and I both felt like we were in excellent hands with YBH as an addition to our team during delivery. Also, my mother has 5 children and now 9 grandchildren and even she expressed she will now forever suggest every female she know get a doula after seeing how well everything went with YBH. We are so PROUD of you Jon & Marissa! You both transformed your young lives through your faith and you allowed yourselves to be molded into the power couple you are today. Thank you both for being so transparent in sharing your stories. My desire is our YBH Blog readers all over the world can find HOPE in your transformation story, no matter their personal trials. Many young and old, who have experienced similar struggles, also need to release the past so, they too may be restored. You two educated yourself in the birth process. You, Jon trained to best support Marissa, as her husband coach and now you can add, great "LABOR COACH" to your resume and testimony. Marissa, I am so happy you decided to listen when God shared, YOU ARE worthy and no doubt, you will and already are worthy of the title of, great "MOTHER!" Thank you for choosing Your Birth Helper & Team to help you and Marissa plan and execute your happy "BIRTH" day! You began as students, but you end as FAMILY! #yourbirthhelper #yourbirthhelpertrained #doula #GwinnettNorthside #JosephPohl #Obstetrician #LawrencevilleGa #bradleymethod #childbirtheducation #symbioticbirth #induction #hopsitalbirth #doulasupport #husbandcoached #vaginalbirth #gestationaldiabetes #laboranddelivery #abortion #drugaddiction #restoration #faith #pregnancy #healing #birthstory #athensbirthfamily #elevationworship #influencerschurchgwinnett

Special thanks to Sarah Neri, AAHCC, CCE, YBHD for training this couple for drug free labor and birth. Sarah teaches The Bradley Method (r) twelve week prep in the Lake Wylie/ Charlotte, NC area. Special thanks to Nancy Cook, BSN, YBHD for her assistance on day one of their induction. And, to nurse Robin at Atrium Pineville, for all her help day two and after birth for helping take photos for the couple. Lastly, thanks, as always, to the amazing staff of Piedmont OBGYN and their support of natural, low intervention birth aka #SymbioticBirth and specifically, Dr. Alvarez for 🙌 catching! Many wonder would virtual services still be beneficial in helping meet birthing goals? I think this video depicts the answer, YES! Your Birth -Your Way - even if that’s 12 hours of support virtually via FaceTime throughout hard labor...email Pam @ ypurbirthhelper@gmail.com wherever you are and we can show you how too! Congratulations to the new family and staying the course, even when labor is sometimes more than we bargained for. It doesn’t last forever and it’s so worth your efforts. What lies on your chest, after you cross that finish line, is so worth pushing through and so is the speedy recovery that follows drug free natural childbirth.

Have you ever heard of the rule of six? More specifically, in education some call it The Principal Connection. Or maybe, you have heard of the six degrees of separation? Some believe for every six names you throw out to a stranger, you typically have a mutual connection. Others call coincidence, divine appointments. No matter how you sum it up, when you consider such statistics, you can't help but reflect on how terribly small our world really is. In this birth story, expectant couple Josh and Elyse, were referred to me by Megan Tipton. I met Megan years earlier in my Athens, Ga Bradley Method® class, where she and her husband Gregory, also trained twelve weeks for their first labor and birth. Josh and Elyse are very special to them also. Megan and Elyse were church friends during college years as Elyse attended UGA in Athens, GA. Gregory, Megan's husband happens to not only be a friend, but now is also their Priest. Part of the reason both couples resonated with The Bradley Method® was their desire to experience a less medical, more natural birth. From a religious perspective, the New Testament shares in John 16:21, the laboring woman is full of sorrow, but as soon as the baby is born, her heart is full of Joy and she can remember the pain no more. The birth process is the most athletically challenging event a woman will ever do. Elyse was no stranger to the immense physical training athletes endure. She formerly ran track for the University of Georgia. She understood likewise, labor and birth would challenge her physically. What she underestimated was the mental and emotional challenges she would face and even long before her first labor commenced. Fortunately, she had a loving husband and his support through it all. Many experience hardships and trials while to conceive, let alone a variety of complications during pregnancy, labor, and the birth itself. Although practicing Catholics, Elyse and Josh were not actively practicing Natural Family Planning. They had decided to leave it up to God and his timing of when to bless them with a child. For readers who may be interested, Natural Family Planning is a highly effective means to avoid or achieve pregnancy. It does take daily dedication to the process. Contrary to popular belief, it is not specifically practiced by those of the Catholic faith. In fact, many other religions use and also even non-religious people resonate. Most find it to be a healthy natural approach. For more information, you can visit usccb.org A rainbow baby is a term used to describe a baby born after loss. Many believe to bring forth life after loss is a miraculous event. I am sure Elyse and Josh would agree. Unfortunately, loss is not a topic of common conversation as many feel awkward discussing or sharing for the fear of instilling anxiety, guilt or fear not only in themselves, but also in others. So many young mothers and fathers suffer in silence. In fact, statistically 1 in 5 will suffer loss before 20 weeks of pregnancy. Most are familiar with the term miscarriage. However, “Rainbow Baby” doesn't just refer to miscarriage, but also stillbirth or death during infancy, such as SIDS. The loss, nevertheless, at any stage of development or after birth is tragic and most often unknown. To better prepare couples who may experience loss, I have asked the new parents to personally share with our readers who may face such trials in the future how they overcome the associated emotions and daily challenges to press forward again. I submitted a list of relevant questions to them and here are their responses... What were the biggest challenges for you or Josh after miscarriage? The hardest part was trusting God and that he loves us. We had actually decided after our second loss to wait and take some time to heal. The next month we were shockingly pregnant again. I was overwhelmed and felt ill prepared to take on the journey of pregnancy again but God provided a lot of grace and healing through the 9 months. Any advise for others who have suffered loss  in getting through the first 12 weeks mentally & emotionally? Don’t stress that you “aren’t doing enough” or “doing the right thing”. Miscarriage is not the fault of the mother, you didn’t do anything wrong before. There’s no “moral of the story” – God isn’t trying to teach you a lesson. He gave you a beautiful soul to carry and you did the best job any parent can do, you got them to heaven. The first 12 weeks of my pregnancy with Kyrian I worried I wasn’t getting enough nutrients because I couldn’t swallow my prenatal vitamins without throwing up. The minute I realized that vitamins weren’t the answer nor the reason I miscarried in the past I was able to be more positive. You simply have to do your best – but doing your best isn’t about being OCD about your pregnancy. Do the best you can but don’t stress if it isn’t perfect – life hardly is. I also found a doctor who was willing to help diagnose why I was having multiple miscarriages and found my progesterone to be low. He prescribed me suppositories the first 12 weeks. Try and find a practice that will help you get to the root of what’s going on if you have subsequent miscarriages or think you have an underlying condition. Obviously, sciatica was a huge challenge for you, (having formerly been a runner), how would you describe the physical challenges near term? I could not walk the last 3 weeks of pregnancy without excruciating back pain. At work, I started wheeling myself around in my swivel chair – that’s when my boss let me work from home, for anyone that needs any tips. What did You two find most helpful along your journey into parenthood? The support of our family and friends throughout the pregnancy and subsequently after when Kyrian was in the NICU. People were generous in ways we can never repay and it’s helped us be more humble and grateful. I teach that timing of interventions matter. That couples should always weigh pros and cons to determine all aspects, ask for time to discuss privately, etc. before making final decisions that could change the course of labor or your target birth plan. What do you feel were your personal pros & cons of choosing late administration of epidural use? Pros: I had a short break to regain some energy and strength before pushing. I could enjoy the third phase of labor after Kyrian came out and I got to hold him. Cons: I had a hard time feeling some of the contractions. I couldn’t walk after for a few hours, which was a huge downside when the nurses took Kyrian to the nursery for monitoring. Josh went with him and after a while, I had to ask for a wheel chair to go see my boy in NICU. What did you find most exciting during your birth experience. Seeing Kyrian come out and crying joyfully at the sight of him. He was born at 3:44 p.m on Ash Wednesday, 2020. What was the scariest part of labor/ journey? Fear of miscarriage and having to decide to induce vs. wait – Kyrian made it especially hard since he was 10 days late. Elyse’s labor had been on again -off again for several weeks. A process I like to call pre-labor. I think we should give moms credit for All of their contractions not just the ones that result in birth. Many women accomplish a lot of prep work this way. Including partial dilation and effacement, lower station, and getting baby’s into optimal positions for labor. In addition, the breasts are undergoing changes in preparation for baby’s arrival also. These things all take time. Elyse shared this special prayer she clung to after her two miscarriages... I asked for intercession from Blessed Charles I of Austria (he was the last Emperor of the Holy Roman Empire in WWI. He is one step away from being declared a Saint. He had a very Holy marriage and a big beautiful family of 8 children. He died in exile at the age of 35. Dad Josh admires both his new baby boy and the amazing strength of his wife. We named our son, Kyrian, which comes from the greek. We say at mass meaning “Lord have mercy”. We consider it a great mercy for God to let us carry a child to term. Elyse Bray Proud Dr. Goggin, shares in the happy “BIRTH” day celebration. Our rainbow babies and those who help them into the world, are extra special! Dr. Fernandez in Florida was instrumental in the success of helping Elyse overcome the issues which contributed to her former miscarriages. Although out of state, she highly recommends him to any who may have experienced loss. https://www.jmjfamilypractice.com A special visitor Fr. Tipton stopped in to pray over the laboring couple and was shocked and excited to see the baby had already arrived. A special bedside service was held in honor of Ash Wednesday. This story is written in loving memory of Marion and Josephine, The Bray family’s two angel babies, named after the Holy Family. On behalf of Your Birth Helper & YBH Teams, Congratulations Birdsell Family! And, may you live a long and prosperous life Baby Kyrian. I have no doubt the good Lord has indeed placed a special calling upon your life. It was my utmost pleasure to have trained and assisted your parents during your extra special happy “BIRTH” day!

Meet Cami and her stubborn little one. He was quite comfy in the womb and well now as you can see, he is quite comfy in his mothers arms. Last trimester, Cami and her husband Cristian, hosted a Bradley Method® natural birth series within their home in Braselton, Ga. Along with other couples, they met once weekly for twelve weeks and were intentional about preparing in advance for labor and birth. Her goal was to work up until labor had commenced and even day of, should labor begin while at work. In the weeks prior to her real labor, she landed herself into triage for elevated blood pressure and tachycardia. She was not alarmed to be sent to hospital, because she suffers from what is commonly known as, White Coat Syndrome. People who have this often have anxiety type symptoms including elevated blood pressures prior to arriving for doctor visits or admitting for procedures. Her doctor would usually have her monitor blood pressure at home and call it back in to verify back to normal, but not today. Funny thing, she had asked me to join her for an appointment near term, because she was planning to endure her first internal exam and didn’t want to go alone. So, I also accompanied her to triage and had her pump water on the way over. Reality was she had most likely become dehydrated, while sitting in doctors office for over an hour, without having anything to eat or drink. Everything checked out okay, and Cami was once again back on track to return home, as the baby, her pulse, blood pressure and bloodwork all checked out normal after some fluids and time to recenter herself. After her estimated due date came and went, she began to let go a little more, especially in her mind. Frankly, she was over being ”over due” and found it quite annoying when friends and family would say, No baby yet? When is your induction? Etc... Cami decided she would take Your Birth Helper’s advice and get busy prepling her own body for Labor. They walked, ate weird foods, did their couple homework, drank red raspberry tea, did pressure points, etc. but one thing she knew she struggled with was getting out of her own head. Question after question would pop into her brain. She may not have been able to get herself into active spontaneous labor, but she did have regular consistent contractions throughout her Baby Evacuation Fun day in Athens, Ga. I tortured her with weird food, lots of hills, lunges, curb walking and stair climbing. Her homework had really paid off and her body was successful in nearly completing all of her effacement. She also found she was 3cm dilated and was quite pleased considering she hadn’t had any real challenging discomfort from the contractions she had experienced during our labor prep day. My team mate Nikki Reeves shared: At an estimated 42 weeks gestational age on paper, Cami found herself confronted with induction under the advise of her OBGYN. Northside Gwinnett’s, Dr. Joseph Pohl, led the birth team which also included YBH doula Pam, myself, nurse Robin, nurse Theresa and other terrific staff. After a round of cervadil overnight, Cami’s water was broken early the next day, Pitocin was also added and cervical changes were well on the way. Here is a glimpse of Cami's labor marathon... Everyone was pleased with her relatively quick dilation process. The second stage of labor however would prove to be much more difficult. Cami maintained her namaste and her strength and determination was almost super natural at times. That warrior woman strength kept her motivated and pushin through obstacles in second stage labor quite literally. After utilizing a variety of other positions, including creative uses of the birth ball, rocking, other positions to open pelvis and help baby rotate into the birth canal, it was then discussed with Dr. Pohl that Cami may need additional assistance to help baby clear the pubic bone. The Kiwi vacuum device was selected as an assistive measure. Cami continued to push with all of her might, and with the help of the vacuum the baby was born shortly. Cristian, the proud new father, made the announcement to the room full “It’s a BOY!” Mom finally had her baby right where he belonged in her arms! They named him Lucas Cristian Bordianu. To everyone’s surprise, he weighed 7 pounds 15 ounces of pure joy! The room erupted into celebration as Dad’s eyes filled with unexpected moisture as he gazed upon his son for the first time. Cami learned she was much stronger and capable than maybe she had realized. She had accomplished her birthing goals and despite all the hurdles, she gave birth naturally. As for the Your Birth Helper Team, we salute Cristian for his constant support as labor coach and commend Cami for her preparation, execution and strength during he labor and birth marathon. Happy “BIRTH” day baby Lucas! Our Athens Birth family can’t wait to meet you and celebrate the day you entered the world with Coner McGregor style! Special thanks to Dr. Pohl and nurses, Robin and Theresa who supported Cami’s birth plan, encouraged her along the way and never recommended unnecessary medical intervention. It is one thing to support a mom during labor, but staff who actually go above and beyond to encourage women to meet their own birthing goals (not impress their own preferences) our true Angels in nurse form, sent from above. Here’s to another #SymbioticBirth with Your Birth Helper & Teams! We specialize in low intervention / natural birth! Take time to invest in your birth experience! Let us show you how to have your own happy “BIRTH” day! your Birth- your Way! Here are some final thoughts from Mom & Dad for readers to consider... We chose Bradley method classes, because I liked that it included the husband as your coach. I knew my husband would be my main support so I wanted to take these classes together. At first, we were going to labor alone without a doula. However, after taking the classes, we got attached to Pam and wanted to utilize her doula services. I knew my husband would benefit from having an extra support person (of course me as well) which was the main reason we decided to hire a doula. Because, it was my first pregnancy, I was so nervous and didnt know what to expect. I am so glad we chose to have a doula because, I could not have managed without YBH. Pam and her team provided both of us support, helped me relax and labor through my long induction process. I felt at ease with the training we recieved. Moreover, I felt empowered knowing about my options and being able to give informed consent after receiving extensive training through the Bradley method classes. I would recommend YBH to assist in labor simply because, it helps to have physical and emotional support on your big day. Pam and her team provided physical support, by using massage and creating a calming environment. They also provided emotional support by reassuring and encouraging me, praising me along the way and helped to ease my anxiety. My husband also appreciated having extra support, and YBH encouraged him along the way! When I found out I had to be induced , I was worried because, I knew one intervention can lead to another. I wanted to go pain med-free and I knew that could be more challenging. I was determined to finish this marathon strong. I tried to stay calm through the process and trusted that body would know what to do. I used all the tricks I learned from Bradley classes to help get through the long labor. I just took it one contraction at time. It helped to be informed about the different stages of labor so, I knew that I was close to meeting my little surprise gender baby. Because I was induced, it was a little challenging for me to move around (my hopsital didn't have wireless monitoring). However, with the support of my team, we found ways around the tricky wires and I was able to move around the bed. Not having the epidural worked in my favor because I wasnt stuck to the bed. Instead, I was able to try different positions that helped me bring my baby lower into the birth canal making a vaginal delivery possible ..and avoiding an emergency c section. One of my favorite positions was squatting. I tuned out all negativity, and had a calm and beautiful birth. No screaming or panic, just a peaceful environment with my support team by my side. Dr. Pohl, always had my best interest, as well as, the babies and never pressured us to do anything we didn't feel comfortable with. He supported my wishes for a low intervention natural birth. Dr. Pohl is very knowledgeable and I trusted and respected him. I also appreciated that he is very big on nutrition which is such a vital part of pregnancy. The hospital staff at Gwinnett Medical was a blessing as well, especially my last nurse Teresa. She supported me as I labored down and tried to get this baby into an optimal position. She blew me away with her expertise as she had me get into crazy positions (not the most comfortable). However , Teresa, our nurse, didn’t give up on me after pushing for 5 hours. It's so important to have a doctor and hospital staff on your side that works together with your doula. This is exactly what I had and it was such a blessing! Congratulations! You managed your labor like a Champ, despite often above average levels of discomfort, disparagement of slow to dilate cervix and a lengthy five hour push phase. There is no doubt in our minds, you two are quite the epitome of a power couple and can accomplish anything together! Happy “BIRTH”day from Your Birth Helper & Teams!

Raeanne and Nick, understood the importance of being prepared to “give birth.” They understood the “why educate?” They chose to train with me in The Bradley Method®, a twelve week preparation for natural birth. Many think, oh no I want to have drugs so, I do not need a childbirth class. When in fact, nothing is further from the truth. There is so much to learn and childbirth class is a no brainer for all expectant couple's. It can be confusing on what class to take. Many first time couples choose The Bradley Method®, because it covers everything from anatomy, nutrition, exercise and relaxation practice plans, to the coaches role, early, active and late first stage labor, second stage pushing and what to expect in third stage and postpartum, birthing options and creating a birth plan, emergency childbirth, and new baby and breastfeeding basics. The majority of all of that information is extremely beneficial regardless of your choice to medicate or not. After several weeks of learning birthing options, they realized they desired a different level of support for their birth and would be better served by a Certified Nurse Midwife. Unless other medical complications occurred, of course. Raeanne's goal was to remain as healthy and low risk as possible. She switched providers to Women's Healthcare Associates of Athens. They are known for being overly supportive of low intervention birth and also of The Bradley Method® training program. They chose St. Mary's hospital system. The labor and delivery nurses are used to birth plans and doing their best to support the wishes of the family. The couple also understood her birth story would be made slightly more challenging due to her recent diagnosis of diabetes which ultimately during her pregnancy had to be managed with insulin. At 37 weeks, Raeanne had several doctors visits, including Fetal Medicine where they had estimated her baby over 8 lbs. We spent the day after as her first official baby evacuation day. We walked over over downtown Athens and up all the slow graded hills. She was a trooper ate all sorts of weird things covered in all sorts of hot sauces, but being a "foodie" there wasn't much she hadn't tried. We did pressure point work and then I sent her home where Nick and Raeanne did their homework, including other natural ways to prep the body for labor. Her next appointment revealed her homework had paid off. She was 3cm dilated 65% effaced, but all the walking had her hips aching. I suggested she get a pelvic exam and adjustment from a qualified chiropractor. I met her at The Anthony Clinic in Athens, beside her midwife office, and they found one leg 3 inches shorter than the other. Fortunately, for Raeanne, it was found to be muscular not an issue with bone development. With some TLC and about 30 minutes of her time on the table, Dr. Puckett was able to correct her hip imbalance and send her on her way to walk a baby out. Raeanne could not get over how much better her hips felt and how much easier it was to walk around. We planned a second attempt evacuation day and the weather was so cooperative. It was a bright shiny day in the 60's and I took Raeanne to the State Botanical Garden. We hiked all the way down to the river and back up to the top. Raeanne was out of breath, but she did it! Talk about some hills! Although her efforts did not result in full blown natural labor, the day of her medical induction, she walked in 4cm dilated. Her hard work had really paid off big! The couple arrived for their medical induction 6am Monday February 3, 2020. They were prepared and ready to see and hold their daughter for first time. Midwife Diana did our first internal exam at check in and said we were at 4cm & 60% effaced. Monday 9:24am (Pitocin began at minimal 1 drop around 7am) Raeanne beginning to feel little contractions, she says they don't feel very substantial, but she is definitely getting them. Monday 10:10am Water broke on its own I popped in around lunchtime to check in and see how they were doing. Raeanne was all smiles and you could tell she and Nick were very excited to be meeting their baby soon! Monday 6:22pm Raeanne took a big nap, we had kinda stalled for awhile. We're up to 15 on the Pitocin. She had a two minute contraction once, but on average we're about 40 seconds long every 2-3 minutes. We've had some bloody show, but nothing crazy. Monday 8:38pm text from Nick: Midwife Diana checked us before end of her shift and we're 6-7cm, 70% effaced (and stretchy) head is down to -1 station. Contractions are getting more frequent and painful and we are holding steady at 16 drips of Pitocin. Monday 9:47pm text from Nick: Throwing up. May be in transition. Contractions much more intense. Waiting for Midwife Hillary to come check. We are laboring in tub and she is feeling pressure in the front. Hillary arrived at 10:12pm found that Raeanne was 8-9cm, 80% effaced and 0 station and said tell Pam to come on...lol. (Thanks for not letting me miss this Hillary!) Nick wrote: And as far as the value of classes go, I can't say enough how valuable the knowledge is. I can't imagine doing what we did unprepared. All of the stuff that would have normally horrified me (seeing my wife in pain, the discharge in the toilet and bath, the grumpiness and discomfort) were a lot more palatable when I knew to expect them. Also, you saved my bacon at the end. I was exhausted and doing everything I could to keep Raeanne comfortable and still moving through the push phase, but even with all my preparation, I didn't think to recommend a position change at the end. For all the dads reading our story, I would like to impress the importance of training. It is so beneficial and helpful for men to understand their role and how they can help. I just really love being informed, but the personal tips from Pam and her doula experience really stuck out to me. Take the naps. After midwife, Diana checked Raeanne's cervix before her shift ended, she told us that we shouldn't expect the baby until sometime Tuesday. I forced myself to take a nap, and after two hours I woke up to find Raeanne approaching transition. I can't imagine trying to do everything after that without that little burst. You're going to see a side of your wife that you wouldn't be able to imagine. I've heard her pain noises before, but they didn't even compare to the faces and body language that she was putting out towards the end. I'm glad Pam warned me about the crankiness, it helped me to not take anything personally and just go with the flow. But when it was all said and done she still had that glow. Definitely give a lot of thought to the relaxation exercises. But don't be surprised if your wife changes her mind, and don't be afraid to improvise. After awhile, Raeanne got tired of the massage tools and only wanted me to rub her with my hands. A while after that, she just wanted me to press my hands against her face, neck and arms, no other movement. Moving her to the tub helped relieve a lot of the pain for transition, and our music helped keep her calm and relaxed. (I didn't notice how much of an effect it had until one of the grandmas put on her own music, and Raeanne made me get up and close the door). Also, do the walking. You can still do it if you have the IV stand, it really, REALLY makes a difference. Raeanne walked out of the hospital when we left, and the nurses were still gossiping about her. (One of them said "of course she doesn't need a wheelchair, she's the walker.") Also, before we got into the tub, the moms had let her labor in the bed in a position she didn't like from the classes, and once I got her into one of the positions she liked, I saw immediate improvement. I'm not going to lie though, Raeanne knowing the signs of transitional labor (and how long it would take her to actually GET the epidural) kept her from even asking for it. Raeanne shared the following... I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes in September of 2018. They attempted to control it using metformin, and had not been successful in doing so. My sugar was still not controlled when I became pregnant, so my GP sent me the Endocrinologist and within a week we had my sugar with in normal ranges. Q: What did you find to be the biggest challenge of managing sugar and with insulin use? Raeanne: Biggest thing was the pregnancy cravings and remembering to check my sugar after every meal. Other than that was not to bad, until the end when I became super insulin resistant and was having to take copious amounts of insulin. Q: What part of your labor and birth did you enjoy the most? Raeanne: I love how empowering it made me feel. It still blows my mind I managed a drug free birth. I enjoyed listening to my body and knowing where I was in labor based of certain queues my body was telling me. Q: Any particular thoughts you would like to share about medical induction did it make you nervous or anxious, etc.? Raeanne: I really wasn‘t all that nervous surprisingly going into the induction. Since my body was showing signs it was doing what it was supposed to be doing prior to the induction date I just trusted my body would do what it needed. Q: What part of your training (techniques, positions, breathing etc.) did you find most helpful during your drug free labor/ birth? Raeanne: I think the biggest things that helped me with progression was walking around and rotating my hips on the birth ball. Some of my favorite positions were the squat and the backwards toilet sit. I also don't think I could have done the last part of labor and transition epidural-free without the use of the tub. Thanks to Nick and Raeanne for sharing their personal tips! Thanks, as always, to the wonderful nursing staff of St. Mary’s hospital, and midwives and staff of Women’s Healthcare Associates in Athens, Ga. Special thanks to Taylor of Here Comes the Sun Photography for first 48 special moments! Your Birth Helper & Teams are excited to share such a beautiful and brave natural birth story. Please help me welcome baby Calliope into our birth family! OMG That HAIR!!

Although, the average healthy mom carries 41 weeks and 1 day to birth a baby full term. Sometimes, baby has a different idea. Sometimes, the moon phase can get the uterus all riled up. Sometimes, bacteria, virus, etc. could contribute to an early water break. Sometimes, due dates are simply wrong and sometimes, it could be the RIBS! No matter the reason, it is not always possible to stop premature labor as in the second labor of Melissa & Shane Leach. Melissa was 33 weeks gestation when her husband took his last work trip to Dallas, Texas. Labor and birth were the farthest from everyone's mind. I woke to a text message that Melissa had sent @5:40a. She thought maybe she had just eaten too much salty food and had allowed herself to become dehydrated, therefore, she had been over hydrating just in case with extra water. Her message shared she began having Braxton Hicks throughout the day, but then she had noticed them all through the night, as well. They had only been lasting approximately 20-30 seconds and were not painful. She had asked for advice to help make them go away. She had tried changing positions and shower. I reminded her the five things that typically make false labor or practice contractions space out or completely go away: 1) Eat 2) Drink 3) Change Positions 4) Shower/Tub 5) NAP/Sleep Melissa began trying the others to see if any changes. She phoned some friends from church since Shane was out of town and put them on notice for help with Shane Jr's care. She requested assistance in driving her to doctors office to be checked out. Fortunately, she was able to have the Pastor's wife from church help out. She phoned Shane to let him know her contractions had not spaced out. She also phoned the doctor's office. I sent a text to Tina Hayes (her nurse midwife), who advised to have Melissa head to labor & delivery to meet with her and get checked out. By 9:43a, it was established the baby was coming and Melissa would be admitted. I phoned all the Your Birth Helper team and put them on call. I immediately threw all my things in the car and headed toward Charlotte. Meanwhile, Melissa learned she was already 6-7cm, CRAZY! The goal of her medical staff was to do Nothing we normally would. They desired the baby to cook until the next day to administer the second shot for baby's lungs. In an effort to keep baby in as long as possible, as well as, get Shane (her husband) back on the ground in Charlotte before baby, Melissa was put on bed rest. Not even allowed to go to the restroom ~ Oh, the dreaded bed pan. Many women struggle emptying their bladder in the bed... bless! I touched base with Shane via cell, we created a backup plan just in case he could not get an earlier flight out of Texas. The plan would be the Doula with Melissa would Facetime him in to still actively take part in the birth. I gave Melissa this instruction, "We will do the opposite of what we normally do, you are going to uncross your fingers and CROSS YOUR LEGS...and to let me know when she desired doula help. Her immediate response was, "OK RIGHT NOW!" Lena reported to room # 236 and meanwhile, Shane had been able to arrange an earlier flight back to Charlotte arriving around 2pm. Nancy arrived shortly after Lena and both found Melissa relaxing well accompanied by the Pastor's wife. At 1pm, I checked back in with Melissa, as she was still texting me"... go girl! I reminded her to let go of stress and trust that God knew what he was doing. That Shane should be landing soon and I was 35 miles out. I arrived to get updates from Tina Hayes regarding the labor plan for Melissa. The plan was to keep Melissa in bed, with every effort to get the second steroid shot for baby the next day. That was the best case scenario, as it 6-7 cm dilated, no one expected her to carry weeks longer. Shane arrived while I was in the hallway speaking to Tina, she brought him up to date with plan and we both entered the room to greet Melissa. After, the couple Face timed with little Shane before his bedtime. Unfortunately, due to FLU season he could not be present at the hospital since no 12 and under allowed. Melissa was doing an amazing job focusing on her relaxation despite the unexpected circumstances and stress of Shane being so far away from home when all this kicked in high gear. Just like the first labor, one of Melissa's challenges again was emptying her bladder. Bless her heart, she couldn't get up and well, lets just say it this way, "Whose idea of fun is a bed pan?" Poor thing struggled several times with it. Thankfully, finally some success, no need for a catheter this time!! We proceeded to try to maintain the bun in the oven, but lets just say the oven temperature was soon increased after Shane's safe arrival back to Charlotte and particularly bedside. With some tender loving care, it wasn't long before everyone realized baby was not going to sleep inside another night. The sun went down and baby had decided the womb service was drawing to an end. Tina Hayes, CNM entered to check her cervix and the green light was given for Melissa to assume a pushing position and help guide her baby out listening to the cues of her midwife. Curling up around her baby, with elbows up and out, legs back and bearing down she eased her baby into this world. Nancy said, "Shane do you wanna announce what it is?" I joined in, "Shane tell us what it is?"... Shane called out with tears flowing, "Its another BOY!!!!!!" Baby had special care from NICU, but is doing exceptionally well, as is MOM, despite the early arrival. However, arriving at 33 weeks @ 6 lb 1oz and 18.5 inches long, no one could imagine if he had cooked 7 more weeks what his weight would've been. We suspect a few things helped baby Ian William out a little sooner... possibly the alignment of Juniper & Moon? That certainly doesn't happen everyday, however, according to Melissa, nor does Shane cook ribs very often. I understand the ribs from Costco may have played a role, as well. It seems Melissa had warned Shane maybe they shouldn't eat ribs because the last time she had them, she went into labor with Shane Jr.. well, lets just say Shane didn't listen. Who knows? Anyone overdue want to test this theory for me? Costco Rib yourself into labor anyone, anyone?... Bueller? LOL ~ Day After Visit ~ Special thanks to midwife, Tina Hayes, CNM, of Carmel OBGYN, Nancy Cook & the entire #YourBirthHelper Team aka the #CharlotteDoulaDreamTeam #NaturalBirth #SymbioticBirth #BirthWithoutFear #PrematureLabor #NovantMatthews #CarmelOBGYN #HusbandCoached #MidwifeAssisted #birth #SymbioticBirth #CharlotteBirthFamily #MidwifeAssistedHospitalBirth #DoulaApprentice #Doula #PrematureLabor

I wanted to "give birth" and it was very important to me to have my birth redemption story, because I was robbed of that experience the first time around. Partly my fault, because I failed to educate myself and even know how to give informed consent (for things like stripping membranes at 36 week exam- something I later found out, is supposed to be a simple q-tip swab of the cervix to test for group b strep bacteria- it has nothing to do with internal exam and sweeping membranes). My husband and I, we didn't understand the importance of childbirth education nor a doula. We both thought, isn't that what the doctor and nurse does? They will tell us what to do. This couldn't have been furthest to the truth. In fact, it was my practitioner who was partly responsible for my poor outcome with baby #1. I had no idea what was involved in a vaginal exam. I had no idea why I should refuse the exam if no danger signs or signs of labor are occuring. And, sadly, I was NOT informed, nor given the opportunity to "give informed consent" when they stripped my membranes during my 36 week exam. Which should have never of happened. It was supposed to be a swab of the cervix to check for group b strep bacteria. I never even had the opportunity to even learn the results from the test, because my water broke after the membrane sweep and my baby not anywhere ready to be born was in a breech position. Therefore, a cesarean section followed and my early little one was in NICU for 12 days. Maybe even worse, the hospital staff kept me from meeting and holding my baby for over 12 long hours. I will forever be grateful for the NICU staff and their amazing care of my son. I longed to be with my baby and because I failed to educate myself, to even properly give informed consent for an internal exam, my entire story changed. I hope my second story below empowers you to not only believe YOU CAN GIVE BIRTH, but encourages you to begin your training today! We have only nine months to grow and nurture our baby before its born (with a good care provider) and sometimes less time as in my first story if we do not take care of ourselves or heaven forbid, you have a first story like mine (if with an unsupportive/ poor provider scenario). My first appointment with my second baby, I strongly shared my desire to VBAC and before leaving the office the staff asked me to schedule my second c-sectionand even mailed me c-section consent forms. It infuriated me. I had just found out I was pregnant and already disparaged. I did NOT sign those consent forms and made a decision to CHANGE MY BIRTH STORY! This time, I trained my body and my mind! My husband was amazing and supported me in class, during homework/ practice, at home during labor and was absolutely amazing during late labor at our birth place. We hired Pam and her Your Birth Helper Athens Doula Dream Team and together, we changed our story. I still can't believe a baby came out of me, but it was by far, one of the most joyful and complete experiences of my entire life. Oh, and my vaginal birth after c-section was way cheaper, even with childbirth training and a doula team and my baby so much healthier being born full-term and after 24 hours of labor stimulation. I could go on and on, but I'll control my excitement now and let our Doula Pamela Sauls, Your Birth Helper take it from here! ~ Maci Volkmer Not everyone comes to a barn in the woods to prepare to give birth, but Your Birth Helper clients have the option to train in their home or at the farm with my team and I. As clients of The Athens Doula Dream Team, our YBH couples can attend a monthly labor role play Intensive Birth Training once a month (free of charge) with the Your Birth Helper doula contract of their choice. Many like Matt and Maci, train twelve weeks in traditional Bradley Method® classes and then utilize the monthly workshops as great practice runs. We make DAD navigate through the trial labor, while mom focuses on her positioning and techniques learned in class. I first met Matt and Maci Volkmer over mexican at Aqua Linda in Athens, Ga to discuss their disappointment in their first birth experience. I was stunned to hear such an absurd story of how a poor use of a routine office procedure, changed her entire story and created such trauma. Most people want to believe the medical staff knows best and what they say do we all should do, but sadly Maci and Matt are not alone with their outcome. Many couples share they felt totally duped, misled, bullied and that they couldn't believe the medical interventions that were supposed to benefit them, actually caused what they, "had to be rescued from!" This is not the norm, but sadly these stories still play out. It is in fact called, "practicing medicine" for a reason. Over dinner, I shared with the couple, my apologies that they had to experience such. I encouraged them to change their story. I empowered them to help plan their redemption story. I am happy to share, not only did Maci push her baby out, the majority of her entire experience was all done drug-free. It is not easy to VBAC, but it is so much healthier for your little one and such a more speedy recovery for mom. Great news is, It can be done! Let my team and I, give you five tips for successful VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean surgery). First, you must hire a VBAC friendly provider. They are out there. It may not be the closest hospital to where you live, but you must think realistically. Increase your odds of vaginal birth by hiring a qualified Midwife. Midwives do not perform c-sections. Most do everything in their power to keep you from surgery. Think about it, why would you return to the same practice who failed to support your choices the first time, and/ or created a scenario of which landed you into the operating room, such as a membrane sweep at 36 week that led to her water breaking prematurely to start with? Here is another tip, reach out to naturally supportive, low intervention minded local childbirth educators, doula's or lactation specialists and ask for provider referrals. Maci was healthy and low risk and lived under an hour drive to Athens, Ga. Therefore, I recommended she see the midwives of Women's Healthcare Professionals. Second, find a supportive birth place. Many practices work at more than one hospital or facility. Why do locals feel one hospital or center is better or more supportive than another (based on your preferences)- ask them. Take a tour- ask what is your percentage of c-section, natural births, VBAC's, etc. Sadly, Piedmont Athens is currently sharing during their tours that 1 in 3 have c-sections there. Choose wisely who you pay your money to and make sure the birthplace you choose will support your wishes for your birth (you need to educate and be aware of your options). Again, reaching out to local birth professionals that support low intervention/natural birth, can be a great place to get referrals, regardless of your choice to utilize pain management or not. Matt and Maci, heeded my advice and chose to attempt their VBAC at St. Mary's Athens, Ga. St. Mary's has proven to be a very family oriented facility which honors family's wishes. Third step to successful VBAC is getting your partner on board to support you physically, mentally and emotionally along your journey to vaginal birth. You will need this support to help you to meet nutritional demands (consuming only well balanced meals 80-100 grams of protein, pretty rainbow colored plates, which can help you avoid things like gestational diabetes, edema, elevated blood pressure, preeclampsia /HELLP syndrome, strengthen your uterus, body and overall health of placenta and baby with proper nutrition. Careful to avoid harmful things such as: alcohol, smoking, drugs, including OTC drugs, caffeine, additives, preservatives, artificial sweeteners, excess sugar, empty carbs, etc. Your partner should literally coach you daily and incite you to train both physically and mentally to the best of your ability, including: daily regular exercise to build stamina (at least 30 minutes a day or more), regular pregnancy exercises daily to tone and condition your low back, abs and pelvic floor (kegels, pelvic rocks, butterflies, tailor sitting just to name a few) and 10-20 minutes of daily (meditation/visualization) relaxation practice (preferably at least 10 of the 20 minutes together with your partner. Hard Labor can be hard. You will be glad you prepared when contractions pick up. Fourth, chose a quality childbirth training program. Matt and Maci chose the most thorough of all birthing methods, The Bradley Method®. The course has twelve segments of study which includes everything from relaxation, anatomy, nutrition, exercise, coach training, first, second and third stage labor basics, complications/variations, understanding birth options, creating a birth plan, how to give informed consent, navigation of labor hurdles, live labor role play, emergency childbirth, labor positioning, pushing techniques, how the coach can help, new baby and breastfeeding basics. True Bradley Method® affiliates teach 12 classes, once weekly for two hours in length. Shortened series of classes are not allowed. Local teachers are independent Instructors, yet bound by bylaws. Any Bradley Instructor teaching less than 12 segments of study, should be reported to the academy at BradleyBirth.com. Lastly, consider hiring a competent Doula or Doula Team that has a proven track record of successful VBAC and natural birth. There are so very many things that could challenge you along your journey. By every definition of the word VBAC is a first baby scenario. Meaning typically a longer length labor as in a first baby to pass through the birth canal. As a VBAC candidate, you will not be subject to induction methods. Therefore, you must get into natural labor before 41 weeks. You will also be subjected to additional routine interventions such as (in our best practices/ birth places): constant fetal monitoring over 6cm, Hep Lock/ IV access, admitting to your birth place earlier (using what we call the 6-1-1), etc. Our Your Birth Helper teams empower the couple to meet their goals through proper preparation. We are here during pregnancy, labor and beyond. We Educate, We Train, We prepare, We help navigate and We help execute your plans! And, together, we successfully VBAC, isn't that right Matt & Maci? Now, here is a peak into Maci’s active labor phase (laboring with her husband & Doula Pam)... Now, from one Man to Another, here is Dad Matt's perspective... What were the determining factors of why you chose to train with Maci and choose YBH Doula services? (From a mans perspective to help other men consider wisely) — I chose to train with my wife and YBH Doula services because I wanted what she wanted. I wanted a happy, intimate birth experience that we could both participate in and would never forget. I think a large part of why men would be hesitant is because they don’t think they have any role during birth and they don’t have the knowledge to see just how valuable they are throughout the process. After working with YBH and experiencing birth first hand I would not have changed a thing. Because I had the knowledge and I knew my role, I can honestly say it was the most intimate, bonding, and surreal experience of my life and I got to share it with my wife. What did you enjoy the most during training? — the most enjoyable part for me was the weekly Bradley Class. It was a great date night and you discuss things that you have never even thought of with your wife. It brings up great conversations and makes you closer because of it. What was the hardest part of your journey? — The hardest part would probably be the diet and making sure Maci was getting the right portion amounts of all the various categories. What was the scariest part of your VBAC journey? — The scariest part was that the VBAC could be taken away from her due to something out of her control. But it goes to show that if you follow the plan from YBH you can get your body and mind ready. How would you rate your midwife experience and birth at st Mary’s vs. your previous practice/ birthplace? — our experience at St Mary’s was nothing short of perfect. The whole atmosphere at St Mary’s is nothing but positive and helpful. The entire staff there was onboard with a VBAC and you could tell they genuinely wanted it for us. Our Midwives Hillary and Hannah were awesome and completely supportive. They tailored their care to exactly what we wanted and needed. What was is like catching your own baby? (Matt) — without a doubt the most surreal experience of my life. It is something I will always remember and I have never been so proud of my wife in that moment. Woman to Woman Chat... Mom Maci‘s Q & A responses: What did you enjoy the most during training? •This is a tough one because it was all so much fun & so cool to me... but the thing I probably enjoyed most was learning how incredible our bodies really are & being able bond with Matt in a way we never have before. It was so cool to see Matt learn to respect women’s bodies and what we go through on a another level. What was the hardest part of your journey? •The hardest part was probably making the decision to VBAC after my first providers tried to scare me away from it. I decided, in addition to my own health, my daughter was worth all the efforts of trying. What was the scariest part of your VBAC journey? •The scariest thing for me was the thought of something going wrong and ending up in a repeat cesarean despite all of our hard work. I knew I had to at least try though or I would regret it. I felt it was the healthiest option for our little girl. I wanted the most natural experience I could give her. How would you rate your midwife experience and birth at st Mary’s vs. your previous practice/ birthplace? •Oh 10 out of 10! It’s not even comparable. The midwives with Womens healthcare associates are phenomenal! And st marys was AMAZING. They are so accommodating to mom & baby and all about giving you the birth you want! I don’t have a single complaint. It was apparent to us after the care we received with the pregnancy that our previous provider wasn’t worried about giving us what we wanted at all. it was more about what was convenient for them. Dear World, Please join me in welcoming... Baby Oakley Ryan Volkmer weighing in at 7lbs 13oz and 20 inches long. Your Birth Helper and teams are so proud of your hard work, practice and efforts to increase your odds of achieving a successful VBAC! #nailedit #VBAC #winning #yourbirthhelper #yourbirthhelpertrained #bradleymethod #stmarysathens #hospitalbirth #athensga #midwife #CNM #prepare4labor #prepare4birth #childbirthtraining #husbandcoached